Wednesday, May 02, 2007
As many people would have said, i am a much happier person than i ever was. There's no special reason to it, really. It's just that i've changed the way i've looked into things. Usually i used to take small things as a huge task, but now, it's neither the other way round.
The way people bitch about others, or even me, is too common and the things that they say are meant and considered to be genuine. I think it's bullshit on stalking people's opinions and making people to agree whatever you've said in a particular way. I've experienced much of these and i would want to say that i'm relatively unhappy about why these things always happen. I'm not one who creates much of a hassle, so you should know that i don't go around talking shit about anybody, though i used to and i do it at some point of time/keep things to myself/rarely does it.
So you think it's me again, unhappy about people, being moody and i should change to keep up with your ways and so on. Honestly, i'm not demanding for something. Not even attention or respect, well, as much as i want to, but i think it's kinda pointless cos you cannot simply change one's mind. So what's the whole point of even trying. I must say that i'm neither sad nor angry, i'm too used to it that i think the best way to get out of this unpleasant situation is just to laugh it off and chill it.
It's actually a simple misunderstanding. And this leads to people's trust being weakened. I'm not one who has a strong certainty, neither am i one who has strong skills in everything. So the next time you're unhappy in the things that i do, please shoot it out and i promise i'll change. And at the same time, you should be cooperating with me in order to make a person's task less loaded. It's the initiative that counts, am i right? Besides, a simple task in school, and you want me to be in charge of everything, is hard for me to juggle. So i lack leadership skills, fine, i shall improve it. But what's not a team when one backs out and pushes the responsibility to the other?
Just like what i've said, it's simply the same old game, everybody talking in circles. It's best we could just break away. I'm not trying to act happy or having an attempt to break a smile, it's just what i'm feeling right now. The whole situation is not about your misery, my dreams. It's just a feeling that one has to overcome. I'm not trying to hide the dark side, i've just looked into things quiet differently, way differently. It's true i used to vent out my annoyance, anger and exasperation into someone's face, but now, i keep it to myself or better still, overcame it all. The fact that we're trying to clear all these doubts and contradictions, we've also been led to a deep, deep misconception. A misconception so deep, i don't even know where the bottom is.
But what i'm trying to explain here is that we should all make this habit to a stop. Though it's impossible to, at least, please, do me a favour by walking out of the room, keeping everything to yourself before we create another conflict.
I've paid my price, sacrificed my undeserving respect for you, and i'll gladly appreciate it if you could do it the same way. Unhappy? I won't tell you to deal with it, but on the other hand, let me know and i'll try to change things even in the most difficult and intense situation.
All in all, i'm not angry nor sad, no really. I just find it funny why these bitching things happen to most people, that it seems impossible to stop it completely. It's just funny, well, isn't it?
5:02 pm
